Login

Last Seen

CB Workflows

Home arrow Forums
iWindsurf.co.uk Forums
Welcome, Guest
Please Login or Register.    Lost Password?
Joke of the day (1 viewing) (1) Guests
Go to bottom Post Reply Favoured: 0
TOPIC: Joke of the day
#8336
bert (Admin)
Admin
Posts: 646
graphgraph
User Online Now Click here to see the profile of this user
Joke of the day 6 Years, 4 Months ago Karma: 16  
Next time you have a bad day at work ... think of this guy. Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Louisiana. He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs. Below is an E-mail he sent to his sister. She then sent it to radio station 103.2 on FM dial in Ft. Wayne, Indiana, who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest. Needless to say, she won.



Hi Sue, Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother.



Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so I thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realize it's not so bad after all. Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job. As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wetsuit. This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This $20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose. Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've used it several times with no complaints. What I do, when I get to the bottom and start working, is take the hose and stuff it down the back of my wetsuit. This floods my whole suit with warm water. It's like working in a Jacuzzi. Everything was going well until all of a sudden, my butt started to itch. So, of course, I scratched it. This only made things worse. Within a few seconds my butt started to burn. I pulled the hose out from my back, but the damage was done. In agony I realized what had happened.



The hot water machine had sucked up a jellyfish and pumped it into my suit.

Now, since I don't have any hair on my back, the jellyfish couldn't stick to it. However, the crack of my butt was not as fortunate. When I scratched what I thought was an itch, I was actually grinding the jellyfish into the crack of my butt. I informed the dive supervisor of my dilemma over the communicator. His instructions were unclear due to the fact that he, along with five other divers, were all laughing hysterically. Needless to say I aborted the dive. I was instructed to make three agonizing in-water decompression stops totaling thirty-five minutes before I could reach the surface to begin my chamber dry decompression. When I arrived at the surface, I was wearing nothing but my brass helmet. As I climbed out of the water, the medic, with tears of laughter running down his face, handed me a tube of cream and told me to rub it on my butt as soon as I got in the chamber. The cream put the fire out, but I couldn't poop for two days because my butt was swollen shut.



So, next time you're having a bad day at work, think about how much worse it would be if you had a jellyfish shoved up your butt. Now repeat to yourself, "I love my job, I love my job, I love my job."



Now whenever you have a bad day, ask yourself, is this a jellyfish bad day?



May you NEVER have a jellyfish bad day!!!!!
 
Report to moderator   Logged Logged  
  The administrator has disabled public write access.
      Topics Author Date
    thread link
Joke of the day
Jones 2003/03/31 15:02
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
marct 2003/04/10 13:26
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Jones 2003/06/08 20:46
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
markp 2003/06/09 12:43
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Jones 2003/06/12 19:21
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Jones 2003/07/02 21:08
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
DARKSIDE 2003/07/02 21:53
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Yoda82 2003/07/03 10:21
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Yoda82 2003/07/08 10:18
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Bert 2003/07/10 13:53
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Bert 2003/07/15 12:12
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
rick 2003/07/15 13:29
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
stu 2003/07/16 10:45
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
MickeyGaff 2003/07/17 08:18
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
RussellBoland 2003/07/17 08:43
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Slim 2003/07/17 18:29
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
fatboy 2003/07/22 17:19
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Jones 2003/08/07 22:34
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
stevescott 2003/08/08 17:07
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Jones 2003/08/08 20:56
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Ernie 2003/10/17 08:15
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
DARKSIDE 2003/10/20 20:44
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
DARKSIDE 2003/10/20 20:45
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
MRG 2003/10/21 11:50
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
kenmorton 2003/11/19 22:49
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
thadiskokid 2003/11/20 10:45
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
thadiskokid 2003/11/20 10:51
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Bert 2003/11/21 11:01
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Slim 2003/11/21 16:00
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Ernie 2003/11/25 09:23
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
thadiskokid 2003/11/26 08:55
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Ernie 2003/12/03 15:42
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
vdublya 2003/12/04 16:31
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
RumourBoy 2003/12/05 13:40
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Ernie 2003/12/05 14:12
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
kenmorton 2003/12/06 22:34
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
stu 2003/12/09 02:18
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Bert 2003/12/16 12:13
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Bert 2004/01/16 10:16
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
thadiskokid 2004/01/16 15:18
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Bert 2004/02/11 12:59
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Jones 2004/02/27 20:46
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Ernie 2004/03/03 13:54
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Jones 2004/03/17 22:15
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
phil 2004/04/28 21:27
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
alip 2004/04/30 15:14
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Ernie 2004/06/02 15:31
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
kenmorton 2004/06/05 20:51
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
kenmorton 2004/07/04 00:04
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
kenmorton 2004/07/04 01:04
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Ernie 2004/07/05 16:30
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Jones 2004/07/06 20:42
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
kenmorton 2004/10/12 22:05
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
jaymaclive 2004/10/12 22:26
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
maxreality 2004/10/13 07:32
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Arthur 2004/10/13 20:30
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Arthur 2004/10/13 20:39
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
maxreality 2004/10/13 20:42
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Ernie 2005/02/02 15:14
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Dan_T 2005/02/02 16:43
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Ernie 2005/09/08 09:43
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
TwoFish 2005/09/08 13:37
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Bert 2005/09/09 09:22
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Ernie 2005/09/12 11:07
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Ernie 2005/09/13 13:28
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
sockgoblin 2005/09/19 17:34
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Ernie 2005/11/24 08:46
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
T15TOM 2005/11/24 17:10
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Dr.boober 2005/11/24 19:31
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Strontiumdog 2005/11/24 20:13
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
WindyJohn 2005/11/25 23:03
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
kenmorton 2005/11/26 19:40
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
kenmorton 2005/12/17 19:17
    thread link
thread linkthread linkthread link Re:Joke of the day
kenmorton 2006/06/01 23:01
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
fatboy 2005/12/19 16:53
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
kenmorton 2005/12/20 23:54
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
kenmorton 2005/12/20 23:55
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Bert 2005/12/21 17:30
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Bert 2006/01/03 17:35
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
sockgoblin 2006/01/03 19:37
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
sockgoblin 2006/01/04 21:11
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
Bert 2006/01/17 12:37
    thread link
thread linkthread link Joke of the day
carvefokker 2006/03/27 17:28
    thread link
thread linkthread link Re:Joke of the day
E 2006/06/05 09:32
    thread link
thread linkthread link Re:Joke of the day
mishman 2006/06/08 18:32
    thread link
thread linkthread linkthread link Re:Joke of the day
mishman 2006/06/08 18:46
    thread link
thread linkthread linkthread linkthread link Re:Joke of the day
mishman 2006/06/08 18:58
    thread link
thread linkthread linkthread linkthread linkthread link Re:Joke of the day
Shawn 2006/06/13 15:35
    thread link
thread linkthread linkthread linkthread linkthread linkthread link Re:Joke of the day
Shawn 2006/06/13 15:36
    thread link
thread linkthread linkthread linkthread linkthread linkthread linkthread link Re:Joke of the day
mishman 2006/06/13 17:27
    thread link
thread linkthread linkthread linkthread linkthread linkthread linkthread linkthread link Re:Joke of the day
kenmorton 2006/09/12 10:24
    thread link
thread linkthread link Re:Joke of the day
kenmorton 2010/02/03 17:41
    thread link
thread linkthread linkthread link Re:Joke of the day
TwoFish 2010/02/04 08:27
Go to top Post Reply
Powered by FireBoardget the latest posts directly to your desktop